I’ve been looking forward to sharing another experience about Koa-Rae’s journey, but every time I seem to have two minutes to myself to write, well let’s face it, I haven’t really had two minutes to myself. Knixon’s awake again. Koa’s demanding food. Knixon’s ripping my shirt away trying to get milk. Koa needs a diaper change which means a potty run. I need to do a food shop. Laundry needs hanging up. Oakley needs walking. Gotta clean up lunch and now prepare for dinner. It’s just been one of those weeks that I barely have had time to come up for a breath and see the sunshine.
It’s been one of those weeks where my 7 month old taught herself to climb the stairs the moment I took my eyes off of her. However, even though it felt like slow motion and my heart was beating out of my chest, I caught her before she was able to hurt herself. Lesson learned, close the door to the stairs.
It’s been one of those weeks, Koa-Rae has decided to make a game out of bedtime. It has been wrestlemania trying to get her to lay down. When we won, she just giggled and got back up to play again. However, when she realised we didn’t like her game, she was at her door gate screaming the house down. It took more than few bedtimes being later than usual but in the end she is snuggled in her own bed dreaming away.
It’s been one of those weeks that I have only one arm to get things done. Knixon decided she wanted to be cuddled in order to stay asleep. The minute she was ready to dream away we would head upstairs to her room. However, when she touched those white, soft, baby powdered smelling sheets her eyes clocked open and we had a wide awake baby again. So one arm it was for the week.
It’s been one of those weeks where dad was away for a few days and I had two little monkeys sleeping in the same bed with me in order to get twenty winks.
It’s been one of those weeks that Koa-Rae wanted to help me cook dinner. There she was having fun stirring the pot for me before she slipped off the chair and landed on the back of her head. Lesson learned, get a stool instead.
It’s been one of those weeks that I had locked my two girls in the car with the keys and my phone. As I was outside tapping on the window, tears down my face panicking trying to teach my toddler how to press the unlock button. She calmly just opened the door with the handle herself. Lesson learned, keep keys in pocket at all times.
I started to question myself, what am I actually doing? Am I even worthy to be a parent? To be responsible for these two little innocent humans? And the answer is YES. I am enough. Things like this happen and it’s okay. I do my best every single day to make these two healthy, safe, and happy. But I am not perfect. I am tested daily. I am still learning everyday. But this is motherhood and I am enough. No matter what obstacle comes in my way. No matter if we have a tough day, week or month. Everyday is a new day. I am constantly worrying if I am doing the right thing for my girls. And the answer is YES. I am enough.
Squeal, sign, mumble
The Bennett Babes
[inspirational shirt from – Birdies and Bearcubs]